OREO’S are my favorite store-bought cookie in the whole world, hands down. The way the chocolatey goodness mixes with the sugary icing between the two crispy cookies—aaahhhh—I just love ‘em! I don’t even mind how the chocolate sometimes gets caught between my teeth, giving me a rotten-tooth grin, which I flash a lot because I’m so happy when I’m eating Oreo’s. Mmmmmm. Oreo’s. I like ‘em right out of the sack by themselves, or with milk, or, OMG, crumbled and sprinkled over soft-serve ice cream at the Chinese buffet. Dairy Queen ‘made my day’ when they mixed Oreo’s with their soft-serve ice cream to produce their famous Oreo Blizzard—betcha can’t drink just one! And now, wonder of wonders, I can buy Cookies ‘n Cream ice cream at the grocery store and have this delight hidden away in my own home freezer! (This treat, too, has brought comfort and sensory satisfaction to more than a few Movietime nights at home.)

I have almost no resistance to these delicious little fat-bombs, so my grocery cart usually isn’t allowed down the cookie aisle unless the grandkids are coming for a visit. That visit can be, oh, TWO WEEKS AWAY, but a gramma has to plan ahead, right? Definitely right. Absolutely. And this year, for Halloween, they had SPECIAL OREO’S with ORANGE ICING! They almost JUMPED into my buggy.

That’s my explanation for the gutted, empty package of Oreo’s that went to the recycle bin on Thursday. They were SUPPOSED to be for Chach and Stein, who are coming to see us this weekend. I knew the cookies weren’t safe, so I took precautions! They were hidden away, far back in the cabinets, so I would ‘forget’ about them. Didn’t work. We got the munchies and ripped that package of Oreo’s open about 9 pm one night and ate half of them on the spot. The rest were devoured three nights later. Turns out Oreo’s aren’t safe at my house, no matter WHERE I hide them.

There is a new package of OREO’s with orange icing in the cabinet awaiting Chach and Stein. I bought them only a day ahead this time. And I am shaming myself into LEAVING THEM ALONE. I just hope it works.